9 Months In...

There are moments when I can't believe my little baby is already 9 months old. When I think about how much she can already do compared with, well, 9 months ago she seems so big! But then at the same time I know we're just starting out and there's so much to this motherhood thing I'm still clueless about.

Sometimes when I think about what's coming, I start to get overwhelmed and have no idea how I'm going to handle the future, like:

• Having another one or two (which is hopefully still a ways down the road) on top of everything else going on.
• Actually needing to discipline, beyond the simple foundational things you can do with a 9-month-old.
• Balancing the desire to give her everything she wants with the knowledge that it's better she doesn't get it all, and picking and choosing which "wants" we let her have.
• How life will change and she gets older and starts walking, talking, expressing her opinions more clearly and often, going to school, choosing friends, learning how to deal with peers, experiencing pain...
• Knowing when to push her towards the edge of the nest and when to pull her back and protect her.
• Preparing her to be the woman God wants her to be.

Of course I could go on, but I don't want to get too overwhelmed here...

As a list-maker, I thought a list of things I've learned first-hand would help calm me down:

• Maternal instincts definitely exist and kick-in when necessary.
• A lot of this motherhood thing is doing your best and counting on God for the rest.
• God gives us the kids we get for a reason. Yes, sometimes it's a challenge when my little night owl fights bedtime and naps (and I'm sure that's a battle we'll be fighting for years), but in talking to friends about their babies, I'd take that over their kids' personality quirks, and I'm sure it's vice versa too.
• There's no one right way to do things. Experts tell you conflicting things all the time, from how warmly to dress your baby to whether or not they sleep in your bed with you. Figure out what works for you and go with it.
• Moms come in all different shapes, sizes and personalities. Comparing yourself to other moms will only make you feel bad about yourself and self-conscious. Yes, you can always be a better mother, but play to your strengths and get help in areas you aren't as good at. 
• Life is in constant flux, but the changes come little by little so that by the time you reach the next milestone you're a little more prepared.
• 9 months ago I barely knew anything about babies. Now I know how to feed her, play with her, encourage her, soothe her, tell the difference between her cries...
• I'm not alone in this. In addition to each other, Matt and I have a lot of friends and family we know we can count on for advice, help, etc. Plus, you know, the whole God's hand being in everything thing :)

Yes, the last 9 months have been the hardest of my life. But I absolutely love where we are right now and am excited for what the future holds!

The Past 4 Months With a Baby

Well, it's been about 4 months, so I guess it's time for another blog post. As hard as it is sometimes, I absolutely love our life with a baby. Not so much in the middle of the night when she refuses to sleep in her crib. Or when I start to feel trapped, like I can't do anything I want to do. Oh, and the days when we're both exhausted aren't so fun. But I have a very understanding husband, an extremely flexible boss and all sorts of helpful advice from family and friends. Plus our little girl is so worth all of it!

Here are a few highlights from the past four months:

Dedication - In addition to having the opportunity to stand up and ask our church family to both hold us accountable and help us raise our daughter to know God (on Matt's first Father's Day, by the way), this was a fun chance to see family. My parents came up from California for a week, and Matt's parents are still in town so we'll get to see them for a few days later this week.

Matt's first Father's Day :)

Date night! Twice! - Over the last couple of months we got to go on two dates! Someone didn't seem to like the idea of us leaving her for a few hours the first time, which meant I didn't get to see all of Star Trek, but a nice relaxing dinner was more than enough for me! Plus I was able to leave her with Matt and go see the whole movie the next day. The second time she did a great job, and we made it all the way through lunch (below) and Man of Steel. 

Common Ground - While my parents were in town, Common Ground was on tour, so we got to go see them up in Kent. In addition to seeing my brother, it was fun to see the show and our friends that are involved as leaders.

California for my grandpa's 100th birthday - My grandpa turned 100! So we hopped on a plane for the weekend and attempted our first trip to California. Overall it was a success and traveling with a 4 month old wasn't so bad. We'll see how traveling with a 9 month old is during our next trip (I think that's how old she'll be?) Anyway, I totally spaced and didn't get any pictures with my grandpa (although other people did - they just haven't shared them with me yet), but here we are with my mom, grandma and aunt:

The church nursery - The baby has started hanging out in the church nursery on Sundays. Of the three times I left her there, she made it all the way through one service and a decent chunk of time through the other two. It's amazing how getting to listen to an entire sermon is such a treat :)

Visiting Portland - We had the opportunity to head down to Portland to visit Matt's sister and our awesome nephew a few weeks ago. We had a great time hanging out, scouring through Powell's books for board books and eating (a trip to Portland just isn't complete without delicious food).

Visiting Friends - We've had a couple of friends come and visit! One of my friends from college came down from Seattle for about half a day to catch up and hang out for a while, and another friend from California (who now lives in WA) came up to visit for a couple of days.

I think those are the main highlights for now. I'm probably forgetting something, but that's what happens when you're trying to remember everything off the top of your head while a baby sleeps on your lap. I have to say though, all in all things are going pretty well!

My Allergies Are Gone! ...Maybe

Allergy testing

Because of various reasons, I ended up seeing an allergist yesterday. If you don't know, I've had pretty extensive allergies my entire life. When my mom was nursing me, she was down to 5 foods she could eat that I wouldn't react to. I would even react to the amount of wheat in one of those small, styrofoam-y communion wafters when she ate it.

Anyway, food allergies have been kind of a big part of my life for as long as I can remember. When kids would bring cupcakes to school for their birthday, I got a box of raisins. My mom would often cook two meals for dinner, one with cheese and one without. So when the allergist tested me for everything I've been allergic to for as long as I can remember (nuts, dairy, wheat, shellfish, cats and wool), I was completely shocked to find out each and every test came back negative!

How could this happen? Apparently, a change in allergies is common after pregnancy. The allergist said he sees it all the time - women who have never been allergic to anything suddenly having them or those that have always been allergic suddenly aren't. It has something to do with the baby's immune system reacting with the mother's or something...he explained it, but I don't really remember how it works. Apparently it's fairly common though?

My first graham cracker in more than a decade

Of course, I'm kind of taking this with cautious optimism. I mean, part of me doesn't really believe it. I've just been resigned to the fact that we'll always need to order two pizzas (one without cheese) and that when the ice cream comes out I'll just opt for a cookie with some sorbet. I did test this last night though, and the results were good. After my appointment I picked up some graham crackers (an item I've reacted to since I was about five) and tried two of them. No reaction yet. I guess over the next several months I'll keep trying food out, paying attention and seeing what happens...

Happy New Year!

Ok, I know January is almost over, but blogging hasn't been quite as much of a priority lately (shocking, I know). Life has been busy, what with having a two month old that needs feeding, cleaning and interaction, both of us working (I went back earlier this month) and maintaining a household - or even just getting food cooked, putting dishes away and washing laundry. I seriously am amazed by single moms that are able to do it all, because with two adults we're still working on getting a system down that works.

Every once in a while it's nice to have some time to each do our own things, though. At the moment the baby is napping (I expect she'll wake up and eat some more before going to sleep for the night), the husband is playing video games and I'm spending time playing on the computer. I've found I have a lot of time to browse Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, etc. on my phone, but finding time to sit down at the computer is a lot harder.

All in all, life with a baby is going well. Yes, I need to find time to work at odd hours throughout the week, but my boss is amazing with all the flexibility she's giving me. Our daughter is pretty awesome. She's got the smiling down and has started laughing once in a while. It's super cute! I know, I'm biased, but my baby is so incredible. You have no idea (and I'm sure I'm the only mother that feels that way about her kids - haha).

I have found that with nursing I have a lot more time to watch TV. This means I've gotten into many more shows. In addition to Castle and Bones, I've started watching Ellen and the Price is Right (although it's not the same without Bob Barker). I also went through a few shows on Netflix's Instant Queue (Sherlock, White Collar, Once Upon a Time and Parenthood), but sadly Netflix only goes so far and I don't want to just jump into the current seasons in the middle. Maybe I'll have a chance to catch up at some point...? I am excited I just borrowed the second season of Downton Abbey from a friend; I'm sure I'll enjoy that over the next few weeks.

In addition to watching TV, I've been trying to learn how to be semi-productive during the day. I decided it's a good day if I can get at least one full chore done while the husband is at work, such as folding the laundry or loading the dishwasher. I'm optimistic I'll be able to bump that up as time goes on, but I'm taking the small victories (a month ago, I couldn't even do one chore during the day).

Hmm...I can't really think of much else to write at this point. Obviously my life has become all about the child, which I think is appropriate for me, but probably not quite as fascinating for you. Plus she's starting to stir so she'll probably decided she wants to eat soon (at least, I hope she wakes up soon so we're not up too late tonight!). So on that note, have a good one!