Goodbye, Grandpa

My cousin (right) and me (left) sitting with Grandpa

My grandpa passed away last night. At 106 years old, we saw it coming. For years we’ve made sure to stop by for a visit anytime we came through town, knowing it could be our last chance to say hi, give him a hug, and tell him we love him.

Despite him getting older and his health slowly declining, we were still able to see who he was in those short visits.

Like December last year, when he noticed my brother taking pictures on his cell phone and asked about his camera, only to be fascinated by the technology that also allowed him to record videos, make phone calls, send messages, and much, much more.

Grandpa's first selfie, Dec. 2018

Or a few years ago, when my mom, daughter and I stopped by for a quick visit and he realized he should offer us some ice cream during our stay. My mom was able to track down a nurse so we could all enjoy his favorite treat – complete with licking the lids and cups when we were done.

Caught licking his ice cream lid, July 2017

And of course, every time we came by, his joy at seeing kids and babies – even if he didn’t realize they were his great-grandchildren at first, and that one of them had the same middle name as him in his honor.

With all three of my kids at various ages

While I’m glad my grandpa is home and no longer confined to his failing body, I’ll miss him and fondly remember the time I was fortunate to know him, as well as the examples he set for me about who I want to be:

His love for people – He loved everyone around him, and would often strike up a conversation with whoever he happened to be sitting next to on a bench or nearby at a park. And this carried through to coworkers, friends, and family. He was genuinely interested in the others, putting them at ease. People felt loved in the way he interacted with them.

Pictured with my grandma

His sense of humor – He had a great sense of humor! It was never mean towards others, but found the entertaining amusement in funny situations, clever word play, or silly faces. One of the best pieces of marriage advice he and my grandma gave to my parents, that they passed on to me, was to have a sense of humor.

His natural curiosity – My grandpa was always learning! He wanted to know how things worked. He was always checking out books from the library (even within the past couple of years), reading everything he could, playing around with new technology, and turning around to show others how it worked. He was especially interested in electronics, cars, and trains. And he remembered everything! For his 90^th birthday we went to a car museum in Danville and he ended up sharing all sorts of details he remembered reading about these cars from the ‘20s and ‘30s – even the docent didn’t know all of the specifics he recalled!

His creativity – From figuring out imaginative photos (years before they were trendy and before cameras were digital!) to MacGyvering things around the house (although I’m not sure he knew who MacGyver was), his mind was sharp, and he was good at coming up with innovative ideas and solutions.

His acts of service – I remember the season where he was my grandma’s primary caretaker, doing all the cooking and cleaning, helping her bathe, plus general upkeep for their house. At that point he was the only one driving, so he did all the shopping as well. Being in high school at the time, I didn’t realize just how much he was doing and all the energy he was expending. But looking back, now that I understand how much goes into managing a household and taking care of others, it amazes me. And I know that wasn’t the only time in his life he served others. He did it all the time. My mom remembers how well he took care of his own parents, going over to their house once a week to help them bathe. His ease in “grunt work” types of tasks show how often he did them, often without any recognition from those around him.

His humility – Despite all the amazing things about him, he had an attitude of humility, putting others ahead of him and praising their achievements rather than his own. And if he was excited about something he’d figured out, he was more excited about sharing the knowledge rather than the praise.

His integrity – Honesty was important to him. You knew you could trust him. He would often go an extra step to be sure you understood his point, in an attempt to make sure what he conveyed was what he believed to be true. And if he was put in a tough situation, he would try to do what was right, even if it wasn’t the easy choice.

Most of all, his faith in Jesus – This was the most important part of who my grandpa was; it guided all the above attributes and defined him. Despite living through hard experiences like the loss of a child, he continued to put Jesus first and foremost. I recently just heard that when his child passed away at the age of 4, his first prayer out loud was one of gratitude for the time they’d had with his son, despite being in the middle of what I can only imagine being immense grief. As impressed as I am by his perspective (especially as I have children of my own), I’m also not surprised. That’s who he was. He trusted in God’s provision and timing. And he wanted to be sure everyone had heard the good news of Jesus Christ. Whether he was tucking me in bed at night as a child or visiting with me as an adult, he always talked about how much Jesus loves me and how important it is to follow Him.

Yes, I miss my grandpa, but I’m also happy for him. He’s home now. He lived a good life and set an example I hope to live up to and pass on to my children as well.